Yesterday I had a panic moment. I realized I had not yet developed a concept for my art practical that I will be working on for the next four weeks. Like a true procrastinator I sat and had tea with a jumble of people who happened to be at my house, sighing sporadically and explaining the woes of an art student to anyone who asked.
The theme of the impending artwork is “Journey”, and as it was I had no direction for it. I usually spend time developing my concepts and exploring ideas, but I knew I had 24 hours to thumbsuck something worthwhile. After all, this is matric and concept is everything.
One of the women that was at our house having tea was staying with us for the weekend. My mom had met her only a week previously, developing connection with her and her travelling companion. They were on holiday from Germany and needed someone to show them the sights. Unfortunately, there was a traumatic situation and this woman had to separate from her friend and leave South Africa early. She needed a comfortable and safe environment for the weekend, so my mom offered her our spare room.
Someone suggested that I speak to her about her journey. I had a spark of imagination and asked if she would mind being part of my art practical. She obliged and we sat down for an interview. Three and a half A3 pages and over an hour of audio recording later, I knew most of her life story and I was late for church. What an incredible woman! Hearing her speak and visualizing her life inspired me to use her story, her journey, as the focus of my prac.
She has lived through so much and come out so beautifully. She prefers that I do not share anything personal on the internet, so I will respect that. But oh my goodness. Her story leaves me speechless. I am so excited to express the experiences she told me about as I see them in my mind’s eye.
Sometimes procrastination leads to the most wonderful concepts. Most of the time it leads to half-baked ideas.
My brain is scrambling to keep up with itself at the moment. My thoughts go in a million different directions at once, hopping from one thing to the next like a jackrabbit on speed. I sit down to one thing, but find my mind wandering to another. Multi-tasking is a thing, but thank goodness multi-thinking isn’t. I would go crazy. Well, crazier.
There are so many things to think about in one day, and the ‘to do’ lists pile up on phone notes, book margins and paper scraps. It is two weeks into term one and I already feel behind and struggling to keep up with life as it speeds onwards. Yet I love how this state forces me to thrive in the busyness. I know that I can be successful amidst everything that is vying for my attention, because I have done it before. Not that I do this in my own strength. It would be silly to assume that, Jesus totally has my back on this one.
However, I still find myself wishing for an extra hour or two to be added to my day, and then I remember this:
I stole this from a post on Design Taxi (great and inspiring website) and I have thought about it ever since I first saw it. It made me consider what things I need to sacrifice in order to become more successful. I am capable of doing the things that I need to do, and the things that I want to do. I can also do them well, it just requires extra from me.
The knowledge that everything is going to turn out fine makes all the difference. I am lying in bed wondering how I will make it through the next two weeks and come out on top. The thing is, I really won’t. I literally can’t, BUT I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. And that allows me to breathe.
“I cried to the Lord and he answered me. He freed me from all my fears.” Psalm 34:4. That’s me right now. I am afraid of my failure to finish well. But the Psalm continues saying that those who turn to him for help are radiant with joy! I could use me some of that right about now! I’m really thankful that all this is promised to me. It shows me that everything will be okay. And I’m definitely okay with that! So that was a short non cohesive thought train which lifted my head more than anything else.